My Year Among the Sunflowers (Month 11)
May’s Theme: I thought they were leaving?!
I was promised an exodus. Snowbirds typically leave in April, a week or so before tax time so they can return home for business as usual. The time spent here are for parties and construction. I’ve never seen so much construction. It’s been a mania beyond the Country Mormons on the acreage to the left for the last four years. I didn’t think that was possible, but it is.
The month started with the monthly potluck, of course, with a Cinco de Mayo theme. They could’ve combined the potluck with the May 5th celebration, but Sunflowers aren’t much for the efficiency of things (have I mentioned 6 months of construction on a 1,600 square-foot house across the street? Ha, of course I have.), so, there was the potluck on the 1st, and for some strange reason, a Cinco de Mayo Celebration on the 4th. Maybe Star Wars day was on the 5th? They did celebrate the January 22nd Chinese New Year on the 12th, so I think someone in charge probably just can’t see the numbers too clearly. But I didn’t see anything about Star Wars in the newsletters.
The Cinco de Mayo Celebration included, for $30, a class hosted by Antsy Nancy on how to make Tableside Guacamole and the Best Ever Margaritas! Yes, Initial Caps! Attendees learned how to make guacamole and pico de gallo to order, along with some great knife skills to improve their chopping, dicing, and kitchen slicing skills! They also got the recipe provided, demonstrations, and tasting of the Best Ever margarita recipe that will have you shouting “Gracious!” (Now, I think this was a newsletter editor error. Could they have meant “Gracias!”? After class, the Community provided chips, salsa, some Mexican dishes and treats. And a live band would provide music all making for a super fun evening!
The first weekend of the month included a magic show by Magician Panash and a Saturday night concert by the Common Thread band both in the Fiesta Room. “Wear you’re dancing shoes!” (Again with the typos. Sunflowers are also not known for their wisdom in hiring good help. Note 6-month construction projects, etc.)
Apparently, the Sunflowers who remain aren’t the best behaved. Trash and used beverage containers aren’t being placed in their proper receptacles and dogs aren’t being “encouraged” to relieve themselves on the grassy surfaces rather than ON the building. “The maintenance staff spends time daily cleaning off the center front pillars so the entrance to the center looks welcoming.” Let’s face it, if you’re 80 and littering and letting your dog piss and shit on a building’s surfaces, you’ll never get life right.
In “The Water Here is Magical” news, sprinklers are now set to automatically turn on at 4am, rather than the usual 5, so the grass should be dry for the early dog owners and walkers now. (Sooo much to complain about. How DO they find the time?) (The sun rises at 4:30, so the Sunflower day starts around 4, and it’s 95 by 6am, so this makes sense. All except for the grass and sprinklers in a desert part.)
The Tech Club hosted a “When You Die Organizer” on the 10th.
The women's billiard club has decided to call themselves Chix with Stix, and the Romeos expressed their approval in a highly suggestive way.
I did think there would be less truck activity now, but it hasn’t subsided. I can’t count on a daily basis how many large, furniture-delivery-sized trucks and drivers I see backing into driveways, knocking on doors, checking devices, and leaving in just a few minutes. Is this because Snowbirds ordered things, then skipped town? Or is it more likely because of the Planning Committee at the turn of the century deciding to reuse street numbers throughout the neighborhood? "Are we at 5555 Baby Javelina Lane? Or is this 5555 Rattlesnake Whispers Way?" "I don't know, man. Could be 5555 Desert Wandering Drive." "Shit, there's a 5555 Cactus Flower Cove!" Sunflowers can be seen exchanging mail and boxes between the hours of 1 and 3 most weekdays, some weekends. It actually makes them happy, this having something important to do, so nobody minds what most would think of as a nuisance.
So, the Freak Show Grandparents (FSGs) are back! We got a 2-month break while they spent spring in Colorado, I assume (car license plates). Not 12 hours passed after their arrival before a backyard remodeler truck appeared. I Googled the phone number on the truck to see what they did for a living/what I was in for, but it was nowhere to be found. The people Freakshow Grandpa hires are just one-offs in unmarked cars, which explains why projects take so long. I really think it took less time to BUILD the houses in the neighborhood than it has for the months-long projects I’ve seen around me this year.
The first two weeks, the FSGs were outside all day every day. I’m mesmerized by this, because I have no frame of reference - I'd have a second-degree sunburn in about 10 minutes. Today, they've been sitting (between fits and spurts of doing things like watering the driveway and sweeping the curb and street) in those folding aluminum chairs that he washed in January, in front of the back-end of their car in the garage. A garage door away from that brand new backyard they've created (playground, mulch, dirt, grass, forts) and about 5 or 6 steps from the nice front patio between garage and front door that's complete with planters and lovely blooming flowers and a new table and chair set they had DELIVERED in February before they gave it up to the AirBnbers. Someone please explain to me why a person would 1) spend every waking moment here working in and around their garage - is there joy in there?, and 2) sit behind their rear car bumper with so many nicer options. They were freaks in September, and they’re still freaks, and will be long after I’m gone.
The newly roofed people had a new 7-person crew parked in the street in front of everyone’s houses. I imagine they were working on the inside of their new two-story second house in the backyard. So, there is a lot for the FSGs to watch out front every day. They and the Roofies back up to the bocce fields and pickleball courts that are a little less active now with the heat and the exodus of most players to their Wisconsins and Michigans and Illinoises for the season. So, in desperate need of something to at least look at between all the doing, they get to watch the workers tote and smoke and drink water and chit-chat.
The morning after his pickup last week, the Gray Baron’s trash can was still at the curb with its lid open. This is a man who is in his garage every day working. He’s 90 if he’s a day, so it’s annoying, yes, but mostly awesome, as I’ve said before. He washes his trash can every other Friday. An open can at the curb two days later? I admit I was worried. The ambulance has come twice for him in the last year. But then, it went inside, and I saw him leaving on his tricycle for his mostly daily trip to the store.
And the pool still isn’t open. Something about something on the bottom costing an extra $30K. An entire Sunflower Snowbird Season without a pool! Can you imagine?